Balanced Chaos (The Void Series Book 3) Page 19

  “Who’s Breena?”

  “My friend. She’s a young werewolf?”

  Newberry sniffed. “She probably has fleas.”

  “Well, you can deal with someone who might have fleas,” said Sam, her voice dripping with sarcasm, “or you can save your wife. Which will it be?”

  “Fine. You can send her.”

  “That’s what I thought. Now if you’ll excuse us, Werner and I have to go do what you’ve been too embarrassed to deal with.”

  With that, Sam and Werner turned away. They marched into the bedroom and quietly shut the door. Sam slipped up to the side of the bed as she heard the familiar sounds of Philip removing his vest and the gentle click of the door locking. She forced her focus onto the skeletal woman hidden under the heap of blankets before she could get too excited by the man secluded in the room with her. Placing her hand below Mrs. Newberry’s nose, she felt the faintest hint of air moving in and out of her nose. Mrs. Newberry was still breathing, but it was shallow and damp.

  “She still alive?” Philip whispered.

  “Barely.”

  “Come here.”

  Sam hesitated, swallowing the lump from her throat. She wanted to run into her arms and lose herself in the warmth of his embrace, and yet when she had asked him to kiss her, he had accused her of doing it for insincere reasons. Now, alongside the lust building inside her, she felt a growing desire to punch him. How dare he suggest she only wanted him out of some misguided obligation?

  As she waited, trying to sort out her conflicting feelings, he crossed the room and reached for her hand, still resting on Mrs. Newberry’s bed. She allowed him to take her hand and guide her away from the unconscious invalid.

  “Sam, I get that this whole thing between us is complicated and confusing, even without the differences between us and the wall keeping you trapped here. Add those things in and we might as well be Romeo and Juliet.”

  “You planning on killing yourself over me?”

  He gave her a little grin that sent a shiver up her spine. “I might.”

  Sam rolled her eyes, never one for romantic gestures.

  “But this I do know,” continued Philip, “I really care for you, and the idea of you only wanting to kiss me or doing anything to me because you felt obligated to me or this woman made me so angry. And hurt. Angry and hurt. That I was ready to… to…I don’t know.”

  “That’s not why I asked you to kiss me,” she grumbled, staring at the bulges under his snug t-shirt and trying not to think about running her hands across them.

  He pressed a finger under her chin until she was forced to look up. “I know that now. But will you say it all the same.”

  “Say what?”

  “Why? Why did you want me to kiss you?”

  Sam swallowed. She didn’t think he wanted the “you’re so hot my knees are going weak” answer, but she didn’t have a more eloquent one ready.

  “Well, I guess I realized someone who was willing to burn to death for me wasn’t just after what I had hidden in my pants.”

  A slow smile spread across his face, lighting up his eyes until she could see all the way into his heart, and what she saw made her ache for more. More of what she didn’t know. Just more.

  So much life—full of stories with joy and pain—lay hidden behind his eyes. Were her ghostly eyes equally alive? She doubted it.

  Just when Sam was about to take matters into her own hands, Philip lunged, scooping her up in his strong arms. He slammed her against the wall, pictures rattling noisily. A small piece of Sam’s mind grimaced at the noise, wondering what Chad and his father thought, but Werner quickly distracted her as his hand cupped her butt, digging his fingers in just enough to make her groan against his heated lips.

  Sam ran her hands under his close-fitting t-shirt, scraping her nails against his flesh until he threw his head back and pressed her against the wall, his hands caging in. His own groan escaped his lips, bringing a lustful smile to her lips. She trailed kisses down his neck, wishing his shirt wasn’t in the way. Had she been free to, she would have continued down his chest, maybe even farther.

  Without thinking on it, Sam grabbed his shirt, tugging the fabric upward, quickly pulling it over his head. Sam gasped at the rippling muscle suddenly on display. Philip didn’t give her a chance to revel in his good looks. He slipped his hands around her waist, dragging her against his chest and away from the wall as his tongue plunged into her mouth, searching her hidden depths.

  Sam wrapped her arms around his neck and allowed him to tow her to the center of the room while their tongues sashayed back and forth. Philip swooped her up into his arms before gently lowering her to floor. He lowered himself beside her, half elevated over her, though she didn’t feel the press of his weight. She wanted to drag him onto her, to feel his weight anchor her to the rough, stained carpet of the Newberry’s bedroom. She tried, but he didn’t seem to be aware of her efforts as he ran his lips down her neck and into the V-neck cut of her old t-shirt.

  She arched her back, pressing her stomach up against his chest. He slipped a hand under waist and held her against his chest for a moment before lowering her back to the carpet, his hand going to her hip before sliding down the length of her leg and gripping her behind her knee.

  Sam groaned again as she trailed her hands along his chest, dazzled by the contours of his chest. She had always known he had been strong, deadly even, but she had never dreamed so much muscle lay hidden under his armored vest. She would never be able to look at him the same way again had she known what mysteries were hidden beneath the vest.

  Slowly, Sam’s hands reached his cargo pants and the thick belt that held his side arm and a few other pouches. She hesitated a second before going to work on the buckle.

  Philip suddenly froze. It took Sam a moment, but she followed suit, her hands tangled in the belt. The corporal pulled away, his eyes alert and focused on her.

  “No, Sam.”

  “No?” she asked, a hot blush quickly warming her cheeks though she knew it would show in only the faintest pink on her cheeks.

  Philip stroked her cheek, but Sam pushed his hand away, ashamed to feel tears pressing against her eyes. She began to squirm, ready to end the whole charade.

  “No, Sam, you’re not going to push me away in a huff. You’re staying right there to listen to me. I’m not having sex with you for two reasons. One, there’s a woman in the room who, if I’m not mistaken, is beginning to wake up.”

  Sam stopped to listen and, sure enough she heard sounds of Mrs. Newberry beginning to stir. Evidently, she and Werner had been extremely effective.

  “And two, I’m not taking from you the ultimate commitment when I haven’t figured out how to be committed to you first. There are real hurdles between us being together, and until we figure out how to overcome them, I don’t expect you to commit to me like this.”

  Sam blinked, new tears surfacing.

  “And anyone who tells you that sex is required in a relationship without commitment isn’t worth your time, Sam.”

  The tears spilled over, and Philip dragged her upright and into his lap.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  It took Sam an embarrassingly long time to collect herself. Philip held her against his naked flesh, dotting her head and cheeks with kisses as he caressed her back and arms. Finally, Sam stopped crying and dried her eyes on her sleeves.

  “S-s-sorry,” she stuttered.

  “You never have to apologize to me,” he said, kissing her again, this time with a different type of passion than what they had experienced a moment ago. “Whatever happens to us, please remember what I said.”

  She nodded, tears flying off her cheeks and splattering them both, bringing a laugh from each of them. “I will.”

  “You’re worth waiting for.”

  Sam felt her bottom lip begin to tremble again and bit down on it, refusing to cry again.

  “You want to get moving?” Werner asked, sounding as though he was perfectl
y willing to stay seated on the stained floor for as long as she wanted.

  She nodded, knowing they had work to do. “We need to report to the colonel.”

  He gave her a mock glare.

  “Lieutenant colonel,” she said, correcting herself even though she still didn’t understand the difference between the two titles.

  “Okay then.”

  Philip lifted her up before climbing to his feet. He grabbed his shirt and began to redress while Sam went to check on the invalid. Mrs. Newberry lie awake, watching their every move.

  “Can you give us a second?” she said, her eyes on the corporal.

  “Of course, ma’am,” Werner said, his work-place mask back.

  Sam would never admit it, but she found the mask sexy. She turned her eyes back on Mrs. Newberry.

  “You look like you’re feeling better.”

  Mrs. Newberry gave her a thin smile. “Something no succubus will tell you is that sex—or something close to it—that includes true love, true feelings, provides the succubus more power than just sex.”

  Sam frowned, wondering why she was telling her this.

  “He’s right, you know. You are worth waiting for. Was Chad willing to wait for you?”

  Sam chewed on her bottom lip, not liking where the conversation was going.

  “I see,” whispered Chad’s mother, reaching out and gripping Sam’s hand. “I know waiting is an old-fashion notion, but this soldier is a good man for offering it to you.”

  Sam nodded.

  “I may be a horrible mother for saying it, but he’s a better man than my son.”

  Sam smiled a little, she couldn’t help it.

  “And those few little kisses he gave you after he said no to sex were more powerful than all the foreplay beforehand… to me at least.”

  “Because…?” began Sam, unable to figure out how to word her question.

  “Because in those little kisses on your cheeks he was trying to show you just how much he cared? He was pouring in all his love… not just sexual passion. When it is both—when you have both love and passion—its, well, its magical. Sam, save yourself for when you have both.”

  Sam swallowed against the constriction in her throat before nodding.

  “Good girl. Now go save my life.”

  Philip waited outside the bedroom, trying not to notice the stares of Mr. Newberry and the runt.

  Had Sam really been on the verge of marrying that boy?

  Philip forced himself not to think further on the topic. If he did he wouldn’t be able to handle any further conversation.

  What is taking them so long?

  Just when he was about to go back in for her, Sam appeared, glancing up at him with her classic pale blush.

  “Well?” demanded Mr. Newberry, appearing in the entrance to the living room.

  “She’s awake and talking—the most alert I think I’ve seen her, in fact. Like I said, keep her off fresh stuff and see if that helps. We’ll be back as soon as we can to feed her again,” Sam said.

  Philip heard an exasperated huff from the living room and fought the smug grin coming to his lips.

  Mr. Newberry glanced between him and Sam for a moment, his mouth opening and closing as though he struggled with what he wanted to say. Finally, he spoke, “I’ll reach out to the clan leaders. I can’t make any promises, but I’ll try.”

  “Even after what I said? They may be the ones who are upset you brought me in to investigate those murders.”

  “The clan leaders don’t poison fae.”

  Sam bit down on her bottom lip. Philip suspected she was battling the words coming to her mouth. He could only imagine the speech she had for the naïve man. After a long struggle, Sam nodded.

  “Fine, if you convince them, when and where?”

  “Here in my apartment,” said Newberry.

  Wisely, Sam glanced up at Philip, and he gave her a tiny shake of his head.

  “No good. How about the courtyard, tomorrow morning.”

  Newberry glared at them in equal degrees. “Fine, but the clan leaders will be bringing their own security measures.”

  Again, Sam glanced at Philip out of the corner of her eye. Philip did his best to look as though none of this bothered him. After a short pause, Sam nodded. “Fine.”

  With that, Sam led him out of the small apartment.

  “Was that okay?” she asked once they were in the enormous courtyard where they hoped to meet the clan leaders in the morning.

  “Should be. We’ll have our own soldiers here, too, and you’ll be able to tell us what they bring,” he said.

  Sam nodded. “Good point.”

  Philip could see the concern on her face. He wanted to comfort her, but there wasn’t anything he could say to make her feel better in this situation. Naturally, she didn’t like the idea of working against her people, but she had signed up with the National Guard with her eyes opened. If she wanted to talk about it, he was here, but he wouldn’t push. He wouldn’t, he repeated to himself with more determination.

  They made their way to the administration building, weaving through the normal hubbub of the building. Philip nodded to the other soldiers, ignoring the sly glances they gave him. He knew they thought they were just doing it to rile him up. Little did they realize, their joking winks were dead on. He was falling head over heels for this woman, to the point of losing control, and if he wasn’t careful they would all know it.

  Werner gave the next joker a glare and squared his shoulders. He had to get his body under his control or the lieutenant colonel would sniff him out in two seconds.

  Sam glanced back at Werner, her hand raised to knock on the colonel’s door, when her blood suddenly ran cold. It wasn’t just that he was frowning. The look on the corporal’s face went far beyond a frown or his business mask. He was angry, and she had no idea if it was at her or something else entirely. All they had done was walk from Mr. Newberry’s to the administration building.

  What’s happened to tick him off between here and there? She wondered as she forced her fist to rap against the door.

  All too soon, Gallagher called for them to enter. Werner reached for the doorknob, blocking her hand, and opened the door, stepping aside to let her enter first as though she outranked him. Sam frowned at him and his closed-off expression, flinging him a little questioning look. He pointedly ignored her.

  “Well?” asked Gallagher before they could reach his desk.

  Sam skidded to a stop, all her confidence shaken by Werner’s demeanor and now Gallagher’s aggression.

  “Ummm…”

  “Spit it out, Gollet. I haven’t got all day.”

  Werner glanced back at the door and Sam followed his gaze, noticing the soldiers glancing in at them.

  “We got the meeting, Sir,” Werner said, taking the big moment from her.

  Sam stared at Werner, amazed at the sudden transformation taking place. Werner stood straight-backed, one hand gripping the other wrist behind his back, his feet spread shoulder width apart. In short, he was back in full soldier-mode.

  “We had to take the liberty of scheduling it for you, sir. I apologize for not checking in with you.”

  Gallagher waved the apology aside. “I trust you, Corporal. When, where, and what did we have to concede?”

  Sam glanced between the stiff corporal and the men taking turns walking past the open door of the lieutenant colonel’s office, peeking in in quick glances, soft snickers drifting in through the door. A thought slowly crept in—the other soldiers had begun talking about them, and Werner was doing what he could to mitigate the issue.

  “The meeting is tomorrow morning in the main courtyard of the reservation,” Werner was saying. “We had to allow the clan leaders to bring their own security, but it will mean little with Sam with us. She can tell us in advance what powers they bring to the table.”

  Sam forced her mind onto the conversation. What issues Werner had with his coworkers could wait.

  Gallagher ga
ve her a quick glance before nodding. “Sounds good. I’ll meet you two here at 0630.”

  Werner nodded once before doing an about face and marching away, leaving the lieutenant colonel and Sam in a stunned silence.

  “What was that all about?”

  “What was what all about?” Sam knew exactly what Gallagher meant, but she preferred to play naive in the hopes of getting out of the conversation.

  “Don’t pull that shit with me, Gollet. What is stuck up Werner’s ass?”

  Sam let out a long sigh. “I can’t say for sure, but if I had to guess, I’d say someone’s been talking about him working with me… a female… and he’s doing what he can to set those rumors to rest.”

  “Going a little far, ain’t he?”

  “That’s not for me to say.”

  Gallagher gave her a knowing smile. “Go tell that jackass to knock it off. While I expect my men to get the job done, I don’t expect regular army from them.”

  “I’m not sure he’ll hear that from me.”

  “I’m sure you’ll find a way to deliver the message. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Sir,” she said by way of parting.

  Sam attempted to mimic Werner’s about face and marched away. Gallagher gave her a playful growl as he picked up a pencil from his desk and tossed it at her retreating backside. Sam scurried away with a grin, shutting his door behind her. The passing men stared at her, amazement apparent on their features. She had no doubt none of them imagined their lieutenant colonel would ever playfully throw a pencil at them. Unlike Werner, Sam didn’t worry about their opinions.

  She headed down the proper hallway and stopped outside Werner’s doorway, giving it a firm knock. Werner opened it, already stripped down to his olive green t-shirt and cargo pants.

  “Miss Gollet?” he asked as his eyes trailed the movement of a man walking behind her.

  Sam wanted to turn and see who it was, but she knew it was best if she didn’t; her mind raced for an excuse for her visit. “You left so quickly the lieutenant colonel didn’t get to finish speaking with you.”

  “Oh, does he need me to go back?”